R.I.P. Jimmy R.

It's nice to see that the network that airs the vigilante program "To Catch A Predator" appreciates both sides of a story when it comes to salaciously coveting scantily clad young teenage girls. NBC aired the Miss Teen USA pageant over the weekend, which basically was a two-hour ogling session of girls as young as 15 posing before cameras for America's titillation. NBC's Stone Phillips will show up at your house and make you want to kill yourself for wanting to have sex with these girls, but the network will happily sell ad time to corporations if you're willing to just fantasize about it.

Miss Teen USA is an all-class production, from the formal gown ceremony to the swimsuit competition. How could it not be top flight? It's presented by Donald Trump! If you'd like to be the next Miss Teen USA, but lack any discernable skills other than frustrating guys at your high school by dating someone much older, that's cool. "Performing talent is not a requirement."

I e-mailed her today to say it was a nice coincidence, with a link to the post about college orientation, noting that it had been exactly XX years since our orientation. Her reply was a perfect storm of surprise, alarm, denial, and consternation in about a dozen words: "are you serious? that's frightening, i don't know what you are talking about! yikes." My sentiments EXACTLY!

As I wrote her back, I realized that the t-shirt I was wearing was purchased during that orientation week many many years ago; probably the first day, likely with money my parents slipped me after moving me into my dorm. My t-shirt is not as old the class of incoming freshmen arriving at Columbia, NYU, Fordham, and other schools across the country, but it is getting alarmingly close to the point where I will be able to say "I was wearing this shirt before you were born, so gimme your subway seat punk."

Stallone has created some of the most long-lasting and legendary characters in pop-culture history, from Rocky Balboa to John Rambo, to Lincoln Hawk, to Marion Cobretti, to Snaps Provolone, to Ray Tango, and more.

In commemoration of the 20th Anniversary of the 1987 movie Over The Top (in which Stallone plays a struggling trucker competing in a Las Vegas Arm Wrestling Championship, and sporting a New York City Arm Wrestling T-shirt), the New York Arm Wrestling Association (NYAWA) will host over 100 men and women competing that day for the 25th Annual White Castle ‘Kingsboro’ Golden Arm Wrestling titles, featuring a championship match taking place on the dugout during that night's game!

I used this picture on the other site yesterday. The more I look at it, the funnier I think it is, so I had to post it over here as well. Jen and Jake hosted a party at a lower east side bar for friends of the site Monday and I got to meet some regular readers, including people whose photos I use frequently for Extra, Extra. It was not a disappointing experience. Most were as pleasant in person as they are talented and interesting online. I didn't get to meet the person who took this photo on a subway platform, but I wish I had.

(Untitled photo of adjacent movie posters, by dogseat at flickr)

"Rescue Me" is one of the things I love about channels like FX, which air programs that could never conceivably be aired on regular network television. The show is raunchy, morose, and usually wickedly funny. Tommy Gavin is the ultimate anti-hero; you wish he could extricate himself from his self-defeating behavior, but at the same time he is so hateful towards himself and others, you kind of wish him the worst.

My favorite character in the show is Lou, Tommy's co-worker at their firehouse (and pictured above). Lou's hounddog visage and slumped shoulders bely the fact that he often gets the funniest lines of the entire show, and his character might be the only genuinely likable one of the lot. One of the people I work with at Gothamist recently got to interview John Scurti, the actor who plays Lou, and that piece will go up later today. I'll provide a link when it's ready. "Rescue Me" returns tonight on FX at 10pm. Here's the interview with actor John Scurti, who plays Lou. It's pretty great.

"Hey, you're a big-time professional site! Why don't you act like it?

"Hey, you suck!"

The other week, I actually had a guy email from France and identifying himself as David Sedaris, who said that my grammar was the worst he had ever encountered in an online environment. Maybe it was him, maybe not, but that hurts 'cause he is one of my favorites, I do have a huge crush on his sister Amy, and he was addressing a man who sits all day with a copy of Strunk & White's 'Elements of Style' at his elbow and at the ready. Yesterday, especially, was pretty brutal. But, fair enough.

Today I was doing a post on the filthy bathroom facilities for cab drivers at Newark International Airport that linked to an article from 1010 WINS, the NYC news station. The station's article had several errors. So I decided to add the following to my post at Gothamist:

"Postscript: In the article linked to above, we couldn't help but notice, amid all the trademark and copyright information tailing the piece, the following disclaimer: 'In the interest oftimeliness, this story may contain occasional typographical errors.' The disclaimer itself contains a run-together typo! We are frankly and totally disappointed at CBS Broadcasting's shoddy lack of professionalism in this matter. One would think that CBS Broadcasting, as part of the 'Tiffany Network,' would have some more regard for the sensibilities of its readers and would perhaps at least consider hiring a proofreader off of craigslist or something. We plan on letting them know as much via an indignant letter."

”I was severely depressed and felt as if I was in a cage,”

The medical emergency that Paris Hilton was experiencing was that she wasn't taking her medication (cocaine?) and that she hadn't eaten anything since entering jail. Well, I'm a born skeptic but I suspect there have been many periods when Hilton's gone a lot longer than that without eating.The supposed reason that Paris wasn't eating is that she was paranoid that someone would snap a quick picture of her while she was going to the bathroom. Hmm, I estimate about a billion people around the world have seen a full-length video of Hilton with a penis in her mouth; also, she basically pioneered the celebrity cooch-flashing shot. I doubt a blurry picture of her on a stainless steel toilet snapped with some guard's camera phone would even warrant a $50 bounty from Star Magazine.

I am utterly agnostic on the phenomena that is Paris Hilton. Is she getting treated a little more strictly than the average person caught in the same circumstances? Probably. But then again, by an accident of birth she found beauty, unfathomable wealth, and essentially the entire world handed to her on a silver platter, so "unfair" might be a word she should strike from her already limited vocabulary. And those are my few thoughts on Paris Hilton. Her sister's more my type anyway.

Randy hasn't been very good at confrontation

Jezzy hasn't been very good at accepting her past, up until this point

Tom mst make the most difficult choice in life. One that will affect them all forever.

I do, however, know a few of the members of this theater company and have high expectations about the production. "Tom's Dilemma" is being performed for the last time tomorrow at the Times Square Arts Center, at 300 (btw 8th and 9th Aves.) West 43rd St., on the 5th Floor. Sunday's a matinee, so set your alarms and bring $15 for a ticket. Curtain rises at 3 p.m. Believe me, it's rare you ever regret going to these types of things.

The young pitcher distinguished himself fantastically: allowing only three hits and one run over six innings, while walking three and striking out six. That is a pretty damn fine performance for any starting pitcher. And unbelievably, Clippard actually hit a double in the top of the 6th inning, so he was 1 for 2 with a sacrifice bunt at three times at bat. As he will probably not return to the plate for some time, Clippard can brag to his new teammates that he now possesses the team's highest battering average at .500.

Mariano Rivera gave up a 9th inning home run, but he and reliever Scott Proctor managed to hold themselves together to give Clippard a 6-2 win. Jorge Posada only managed to hit 1 for 4 with a walk during the game, but his one hit was another homerun, which moved him into 10th all-time among Yankees batters. Jeter went 2 for 4, with an intentional walk. His two hits were a double and a two-run homer.

Odd game note: first baseman Doug Mientikiewicz was hit by the Mets pitcher in the top of the 7th, but homeplate umpire Tony Randazzo wouldn't let him take his base, saying that he had purposefully not avoided a hardcutting curve ball. You don't see that very often.

Boston's in town tomorrow and Mike Mussina's the expected starter for the Yanks. It could not go more disastrously than Boston's last visit to the Bronx.

What is even the point of this? Am I supposed to be tricked into thinking "Oh yeah! I forgot that I emailed myself 40 times today. I wonder what I sent?" or "I can't wait to see what a guy named jackass is so intent on telling me that he emailed me 110 times in a row?" Here's what "blowjob" couldn't wait to tell me:

Hi guys! Cheak my home page plz... Have pleasure when open it??? I Think
Yes! Becous this is BLOWJOB! It`s The Coolest and THE Biggest site about
Blowjob! The Hotest babes take blowjob! Super sexy!!! Cheak this out and
take it easy ;)

Jackass has been entreating me to enroll in an Italian rehab clinic for the last seven months. The ones addressed from myself are actually just blank IDs that a software forwarder for another address sends me, which is actually even lamer than trying to fool me that I am emailing myself.

Things have reached such a pathetic state that late last week I actually read the entire text (and it was looong) of a message sent to me by a Nigerian who was most excited about undertaking a properous business venture with me. At least I got the impression that he cared about wasting my time.

Again in the 6th inning, Nieves was the second Yankee to bat following the team's first baseman. In this case, however, Mientkiewicz had just grounded out and the bases were wide open with no one to advance. On a 1-0 pitch, Wil seized his destiny and swung away, connecting and sending the ball into left field. It should be noted at this point that Nieves hasn't just not hit this season, he hasn't been scored with a hit in five years: since 2002 when he played for the San Diego Padres. OK, so here is Nieves, who hasn't had to run up the first baseline in a game for five years, probably giddy with excitement. And damn if he didn't hit that ball deep. He should just round first and go for the double while he's at it. And second base is where he was met by Texas Ranger Kinsler, who was waiting for him after a strong throw from Wilkerson, the Texas left fielder. In spite of his overexuberance in trying to get to 2nd, Nieves was still credited with a single.

Nieves teammates in the dugout were obviously thrilled that he'd finally gotten a hit for the first time in five years. But they appeared to be howling in laughter at the fact that he was tagged out for trying to stretch that hit into a double. The Yanks were up 6-2 at that point in the game, so they could afford a chuckle at Nieves triumph and expense. They wound up winning the game with that score.

NB: Mike Mussina was on his game, giving up only two runs on three hits with one walk and two strikeouts over six innings. Two asshole fans were arrested in the top of the 9th for running onto the field--in separate incidents--while Mariano Rivera tried to close for the win.

The idea of a museum celebrating the Constitution's first amendment guarantee of a free press seems like a great idea, especially if it's one that highlights the great personal costs that can be associated with exercising that freedom. That sounds like what the new Newseum being built in Washington D.C. might offer:

Time magazine’s armored truck from the Balkans, pockmarked with bullet holes, has been hoisted into place. The laptop used by Daniel Pearl, the Wall Street Journal reporter murdered in Pakistan in 2002, has arrived. So has the vest that Bob Woodruff of ABC was wearing last year when he was wounded by a roadside bomb in Iraq.

Like the modern media that enjoys those hard-fought and costly freedoms, however, it seems like the Newseum is eager to cheapen, trivialize, and whore itself out for a buck as quick as it possibly can. One of the items also on display will be the bedroom slippers of Ana Marie Cox, the original Wonkette, who partnered up with a hooker to make her name as a blogger/journalist while helping the hooker sell her book. So, real classy. And nothing shouts freedom of the press like luxury apartments and a Wolfgang Puck restaurant!

The building’s transparent exterior is meant to convey the idea of a free press and an open society. A mammoth rectangle frames the facade, suggesting a television or computer screen that provides what the museum calls a “window on the world.” Visitors enter through a Great Hall of News, where they can see breaking stories on a giant digital “zipper” before setting out on a 1.5-mile path of displays and interactive kiosks. The building, which has seven floors, also contains 135 upscale apartments, Newseum shops and Wolfgang Puck’s three-story restaurant, the Source.

Remember when people used to bitch about the proliferation or growing size of museum gift shops? That was so cute. This isn't a museum about freedom of the press. This is a museum about the media. A big profitable, self-aggrandizing, navel-gazing window into the world of news as business and spectacle. If I were Marianne Pearl, I would ask for my late husband's laptop back.

Images of Old New York
I find a site with a literal treasure trove of historical photographs. The NYC ones alone are worth looking through for hours. Certified Time Waster.

Penny Antics
Race-baiting pol reduce a Chinese take-out worker to tears in front of the media and threatens future jail time to boot. He is called out on his assholery.

Murdoch Bids For Wall Street Journal
NY Post and Fox News owner Rupert Murdoch bids for the most esteemed property in newspaper publishing. We mock up what a News Corp.-owned Journal might look like.

Claremont Academy to Ride Off Into the Sunset
The oldest horse stable in the country, blocks from Central Park, is quickly closed for given reason of overcrowding on the park's bridle trails. Something smells in the stable though, so I suss out the property's prospects for condo development.

Last Ride Out of Claremont
Claremont instructors take the stable's horses out for a final ride around Central Park as onlookers cry and cheer, and lo!, the ink is already drying on the stables' sale to condo developers. Readers and riders cry "horseshit!" in the comments section.

Family, Friends, and Co-workers Pay Tribute to Marvin Franklin
One of two subway track workers killed on the job within days of each other is buried in Queens. The track inspector was also a talented artist whose frequent subjects were the homeless. His death, and the recent death of two homeless people in the subway, are a tragic intersection of two stories.

I'll try not to be so slack in the future about updating posts over there back here. In the meantime, a good link one should probably just bookmark is this one. It's a link-list of all my entries at Gothamist.com.

As much as I love New York City, I wonder if I'll ever know its nooks and crannies as well as my friend pictured above. While many of our friends headed off to the sticks after high school (cities like Boston and DC), this woman made a beeline for NYC, where she spent . . . let's just say many many years. I would come for visits and she would drag me from one end of Manhattan to the other. I would not know where the hell I was half the time. She was my municipal mentor, which is kind of funny considering we grew up around the corner from each other.

Youthful antagonisms can flower into the best friendships, and I believe we still have a good one, despite her decampment to parts practically unknown down south a few years ago; I believe it's called Ball-mor or something, but who can tell with those accents? In the meantime, I feel like I'm holding her an open seat on a crowded subway train up here in NYC. Actually I should be holding two. The gentlemen in the above picture is her husband, who grew up in NYC, so it's a perfect match obviously. They just got married today and, looking at my clock, the west coast reception should be getting into full swing right about now.

Last year, I was on one of my city constitutionals, where I tend to walk for long periods of time with no particular destination, but a vague idea of the types of things I want to see. It was relatively early in the evening, but it was a winter month, so almost dark. I was walking east on 20th St. and saw a pair of people walking towards me as I approached Irving Place. We met right in front of the gates to Gramercy Park, and it was my now-married friends in town from Balmoral(?) to see a small show. Given that they no longer lived in NYC, I was walking in a completely random fashion, and they weren't even near the venue they were destined for, it was very serendipitous. I hope both our paths keep crossing for a long time. Congratulations M&B! Best wishes for a continued wonderful life together.

(M&B rehearsing their performance art piece in which they become anthropomorphosized semaphor flags)