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      « BOMBING AT THE THEATER | Main | SAVE THE CHILDREN »

      October 28, 2003

      DEPARTMENT OF SELF PARODY

      I imagine that when one is surrounded by nothing but kowtowing
      bootlickers 24 hours a day, a celebrity gets the feeling that there is
      nothing that he or she cannot accomplish. Everyone agrees with
      everything they say, so why not apply that magical power where it
      really counts, like solving the Middle East peace crisis between Israel
      and the Palestinians? That's what href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2003/10/26/w
      brad26.xml&sSheet=/portal/2003/10/26/ixportal.html">Brad Pitt, Jennifer
      Aniston, and Danny DeVito
      want to do:

      Brad Pitt, his wife, Jennifer Aniston, and Danny DeVito
      are among the stars who aim to succeed where world statesmen have
      stumbled.


      "The past few years of conflict mean that yet another generation of
      Israelis and Palestinians will grow up in hatred," reads a statement
      from Pitt and Aniston. "We cannot allow that to
      happen."

      Others joining in this embarrassing foray include Seinfeld
      co-star Jason Alexander and actor Ed Norton. Some might consider these
      people's lack of "experience" or "knowledge" or "something to
      contribute aside from glamour" to be a handicap. Not this crew.
      The organisers admit that none of the actors has any
      experience of the Middle East or of conflict resolution, but argue that
      this may be a good thing as they will be considered non-
      partisan.

      Perhaps this is the trend of the future. Is there anyway we can
      send simpleton singer href="http://www.mtv.com/onair/newlyweds/nick_and_jessica/">Jessica
      Simpson
      and her eye-rolling husband Nick Lachey to North Korea for
      nuclear disarmament talks?
      We can only pray that Seinfeld co-creator Larry David stays out
      of this type of thing though, or we'll have nuclear armageddon within
      the month.


      Read more for some fictitious and possibly offensive content associated
      with this story.

      Tagged:

      Despite their best efforts, celebrity peacemakers may have a hard road
      to travel before collecting their Nobel Prize.

      Initial meetings between Israelis and Palestinians got
      off to a rocky start when Pitt made an effort to reach out to the
      residents of U.N. refugee camps. "Look, I can tell you that having had
      a long career in Hollywood working alongside a large number of agents
      and producers, I know what it feels like to be jerked around by a bunch
      of pushy Jews." His wife Jennifer Aniston added that although she was
      relatively unfamiliar with the Arab situation in the Middle East, when
      she lived in Manhattan she frequently took cabs. Aniston was then
      asked to participate in a photo-op kissing a Palestinian baby, which
      then exploded.

      Posted by Lexiphane at October 28, 2003 12:38 PM

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